Friday, August 29, 2008
Its that time of the year again when people we know are unfortunately reminded of 3 things.1) They're still very much a loser since the previous year they've checked. (HAHAHAHA!)
2) 1 year closer to whatever manner of preordained death life has promised them.
3) They should if not already, always be in a unreasonable state of eyes-darting palm-sweating fear.
No, the fear's not stemmed from the edging up of the inescapable passing into the oblivion or whatever form of afterlife, depending on what religion you subscript to.
But rather, its about the celebration that always lurks around the day they were shoved into this shithole of a world!
Yes, you've guessed it! Its birthday time, folks! With me, the victims and whoever is hopping on the Torture Express!
I intended to have it developed into an A4 picture for both their funerals should they not survive that celebration. Yes, a birthday celebration always carries with it the potentially life threatening danger.
Having both their birthdays reasonably close in the month of August, me and my band of croonies decided to have a joint celebration in view of many lean purses and wallets, an inexorable result from the passing of roughly 1/2 a month since pay day.
Being the main conspirator, I've looked up on dozens of webbies (NOT PORN!), from sourcing weather forecast to seeking bus services and concluding the preparation of the plot, digging around for some memorable dinning experiences in its walk-friendly proximity.
All of my effort put in for a refreshingly enjoyable day in East Coast Park, cycling or blading on sun drenched pavements which are sprinkled and surrounded with babes clad in the most enticing manner posible. And to seal the deal, a sumptuous dinner at a warmly lit restaurant which we'll dine, chat and laugh the night away.
Instead, look how it all turned out.
It rained. And rained. Even after the setting of the sun and rising of the moon it still rained.
Fate with its perverse sense of humor ambushed us at every turn possible, turning what brilliant idea for a celebration in the sun and all the considerable effort put in to make it goddamn possible into another one of its sick joke, marring the perfect day I've painstaking planned with a disappointing start.
Not to mention damping the mood for festivity. Pun totally intended anyway.
Failure, beside teaching us of society's response in our achievement of it, usually in the form of public humiliation, also taught us the need for contingencies.
Originally the wet weather program I had in mind was a karaoke session at the Kalang area and a subsequent birthday dinner in any of its many famous eateries. Albeit a little lackluster, the idea itself still manages to live up to the expectation of a birthday celebration.
However, with many mouths came many suggestions, warping the backup plan from as it was till it became a celebration on ice (Ice skating you moron. Where else to find ice big enough to celebrate on!?) at the recently refurbished Kalang ice skating ring and ultimately, ice skating at the plain old Jurong Entertainment Centre. Argh!
Not again!
And so $17.30 of cab fare from East Coast Park back to Teban and then to JEC later, we have landed on home ground ice!
Whey Wei Jian don't oogle at the ladies leh!
Romance served cold.
The only people who knew and enjoyed how to skate. Well passably.
It was years since any of us lay foot on ice and skating came back to most of us in bits and pieces, often leading to awkward and seemingly unstable footing. But came back it all did after fumbling for a quarter of an hour, sending us gliding around the ring in semi amateur manner.
Unfortunately for those newly acquainted with their ice skating boots and know nuts about what to do with them other then putting them on, were in for a rough ride.
First time skating together!
Putting one foot before the next became all they were concerned with for the next 2 hours. Crawling at a snail's pace in a circle and clinging on to the sidewall railings for dear life weren't really anyone's idea of fun.
I can safely put my money on that other than intensely sore feet and mild shivering from the cold, they had a really shitty time. And since Wei Jian was one for them, I say the celebratory activity was pretty much screwed.
Men in pain!
Argh why don't they feel any pain at all. No fair!
Not really my idea anyway but I share the blame nonetheless.
Up next comes the good old birthday dinner that we've heard so much over the years and yearn to hear even more!
Choice of slaughter ground this time round?
A place which packs a steady flow of human traffic to chase away that dreaded feeling of isolation that you find in so many desolated malls, somewhere which houses a myriad of decent restaurants for us to choose from, and - you've guessed it - a place which conforms to our total agreement regarding the range of venturing, in plain simple fucking English, some dump that's disgustingly NEAR.
Where else would fit the bill other than IMM, my dear readers.
I can see the disappointment oozing out of you. Know what? Welcome to the club.
But come to think of it, thank god we didn't just eat at JEC after already had our afternoon spent there or I'll really shoot myself in the head.
After a quick shuttle bus ride over to IMM and a little tottering around on the ground floor where all the restuarents were vying for business, we settled in at the seldom patronized Cafe Cartel, a shot at seasoning the evening meal experience with tiny splash of novelty.
Look who I found wandering around! I miss you, Xiao Bai, and your cabbage dance!
The joint.
Feed them!
Orders were made with little fuss and we were serve promptly, wolfing down our meals with the least decorum possible before one transgresses into the region of the uncouth.
SHOCKED!!!
Always accompanying our meals is the usual heartwarming banter, peppered with the anecdotes which were at times answered with further comments but always ending with intense laughter. From the drool inducing start till the burpish end, the meal was impeccably the climax of the outing, intoxicating everyone with sense of contentment.
Wei Jian: Wah lau I eat you also wanna take picture. You like me so much meh you stalker!?
The new spokesperson for Cafe Cartel.
The battlefield with all its casualties lying in bits and pieces.
Don't forget a group photo!
Little do they know that dinner has always been the the traditional excuse for foreplay, paving way for a diabolically sweeter desert we'll serve to those two happy unsuspecting birthday boys. Yum.
With the two victims-to-be adjourning from the scene for an overdue pee break, we (Especially me.) hasten our arse and whisked up a vile concoction that'll serve both as a ritualistic beverage for their passing of another year as well as insidiously fun filled entertainment for the rest of us watching them drink it.
The ingredients to a cup of puke tonic.
Voila! The esscence of all things vile and disgusting!
The result? I'll let the pictures do the talking.
WTF! Not this again!
What's in it!?
Fuck! Do we have to drink this shite?
Oooh I would have given alot not to be them then.
Brand this image of Thomas's ostentous suffering and savour it forever more!
Wei Jian's barely reining in his puking reflex.
With a little coaxing here and a little taunting there, the drinks found home through their mouths, riding into their churning stomach and lived happily ever after!
With the cocktail ritual religiously observed, we kicked back and waited for the bill before we shove out. And waited. And fucking waited!
Does he look like he's blowing Wei Jian or puking all over his jeans?
All that waiting drove Thomas homocidal.
Thomas enjoys sticking it into everyone. A totally vulgar statement!
Stoned.
K.O.
Someone call the morgue and their next of kin please?
I am a survivor. I'm gonna... *yawn* not make it...
Finally the bill came!
Drunk from both Thomas's and Wei Jian's exquisite sufferance and tired by the excessively needless waiting, we concluded the festivity and called it a night.
Or did we?
Yeah, it was mahjong again. B.O.R.I.N.G.
We are a predictable bunch, aren't we?
FUNKED IT ALL UP ON 3:50:00 PM
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
The ponderous phenomenon that has cast a quizzical overtone to my stagnant life these past few weeks has left me feeling strangely contented.My time at work these days are getting mercifully shorter, rarely ever hitting the 6 hour mark, though I've spent most of it on menial labor.
Sleep on the other hand has greedily stolen more than my usual fix of 6 hours, effectively incapacitating me for yet another 8 more, rendering little time left for whatever other aspects left of my life.
No longer have I the time to play the games I don't enjoy, watch DVDs for the umpteen time, hang around online doing nothing in particular or even blog about the mundane that only lesser than a hand full of people read about?
Oooh. Talking about blogging, I had an eventful weekend filled with decent amount of photos and tons to talk about. You'll be so thrilled.
Okay, back to my rantings before I sidetrack and hit a totally different vein of feelings again.
All in all, lesser time stolen by work yields an even lesser resultant personal time?
Irony seemed to be the staple these days.
Which brings me back to my initial question. Then why am I filled with contentment still, despite losing my semblence of a life?
And while we're at it, why do I even love bananas?!
FUNKED IT ALL UP ON 6:43:00 PM
Friday, August 22, 2008
A fairly exotic and not to mention exorbitant interest I'm picking up led me on my way to the nostalgic (Why nostalgic? Another story for another time kids.) Tanjong Pagar too early on a Saturday.No, I'm not turning gay. Exotic! Not erotic! Learn to read for the love of all things heterosexual.
So what is that I wanted to pick up? Why I'm glad you asked 'cause I've been meaning to tell you to shut the fuck up and read on. That or kill yourself with a bullet through your pathetic excuse for a brain.
I'm mean and I'm loving it!
Anyway setting off on the right foot demanded we attend to matters close to the stomach first and that we did as I met up with Ruilong for a quick lunch before making our way.
Where else is better than the unfailingly mediocre shopping centre which we all came to despise and spit upon, the one and thankfully only, good old JEC(Jurong Entertainment Centre.).
A twitcher and a lunch date. Kinda.
Not a very sumptuous lunch I assure you but its a lunch nonetheless.
A brief and burpish affair, our lunch was concluded and we met up with Aaron to catch a train on down to Tanjong Pager where we planned to rendezvous with the rest of the party to do handle the paperwork.
Paperwork. No fun getaway of any sort escapes unscathed by its tedium. Oh well.
Aaron doesn't own an EZlink card. Where's his culture man!?
Wenlong, Aaron and Ruilong figuring out where the heck that place is. Me? I'm just contented taking pictures, thank you very much.
Tucked neatly away on the 3rd floor in one of the many modernized restorations of age old shophouses, the office we spent 15 baking afternoon minutes searching for just sat lying there amongst its brethren, not even bothering to hail out at us to save us the trouble. Inconsiderate place really.
Barking up the wrong tree. In this case, the wrong street.
Why don't we ever see any gangster fights in back alleys?
The lost boys?
Mild irritation imparted by all that unnecessary sweating gave way to tingling excitement as we reached the end of the stairs up towards the office, took off our shoes and entered the office.
Tricked by the stiff and self respecting exterior of the place, my expectations of the joint were anywhere but on the mark. All I could say after giving the place a good 2 seconds look and an another 2 for the shock to slip off was evidently what my favorite blogger Blinky Mummy always say. FWAH!!!
If you haven't figure out what hobby I'm picking up by now, I can for certain said that all that oxygen and nutrients never made it up past your neck.
Nice or what?! Anyway this is the only frontal shot of Wenlong which he unwillingly posed for.
Guo Huang and Germaine. Lovely couple eh?
Yes folks. I'm finally picking up diving after my feeble will power was crushed into dust by the overpowering hunger for adventure nutured by the mundane happenings of my life.
Sigining on for such an expedition to the deep blue is more trouble than it would seem. There was this form for acknowledgement of danger, that form for health declarations and others for tedious details which did bored me to tears.
Luckily there was Meowzer. Or I would have opened a vein seeking escape from the agonizing existence of my life further compounded by all that form filling!
Meet Meowzer! Say meow!
So for minutes on end, my attention drifted between ticking funny little boxes on the forms, keying in my particulars on the computer and petting that little ball of fur. With such a arresting distraction at arm shot, all that needed filling were filled even before my patience could be wore off and I started to complain.
Sigh. I'm actually quite sullen by the fact that I was kinda robbed of my chance to whine.
We proceed to submit our forms and in ones completed our payment to seal the deal. After the deed was done and over with, a few of us who couldn't keep our grubby fingers to ourselves began tinkering with the seductively professional assorted diving gear on display on the racks.
Time to pay the piper!
Thus began an equally time consuming episode of shopping which stole the better half of the afternoon, pulling it right under our feet and sent us landing with a sudden thud into doorstep of evening.
It still ain't clear to me whether it was Monica's compelling sales speech or was it our own compulsive desire to better ourselves in a new hobby, but most of us did came out of the joint with bags big and small.
Shopping frenzy!
We are closer than your average stranger. Not literally of course. But yeah, definitely closer.
Hunger crept past us unknowingly amidst the afternoon's happenings and left famishment in its wake. And not to mention that no true food connoisseur in the right state of mind would pass up a chance to pamper their taste buds when Maxwell Market is but 10 minutes walk away, along with the Original Ya Kun laying literally just around the corner.
Digressing, did you know that the Ya Kun at Tanjong Pagar was my fave haunt back in the days when I was still dressed in blue 1/2 of the weekdays, had my facial features dotted with pimples and was perpetually on overdrive, the unfortunate result of a hardcore tea addiction.
I've been wanting to come back for a long time since my reinstatement of my singlehood.
Not that I am partial to blue, mind you, but the colors of one's Secondary school uniform isn't really opened up to discussion.
I see I'm boring you folks more than usual. Fine! Back to the recountal then, see if I care!
As most parted ways, making their way through their day and through their list of other appointments, me, Ruilong and Aaron, with social schedules to rival the bleakness of the North Pole, were left to our own vices.
And look where 3 ravenous stomaches got us.
You're drolling on your keyboard.
Machiam advertisment hor?
Meet Aaron and his newly aqquired flippers! Yah and the bag of some other diving stuff too.
Though toast and tea didn't really filled us up, it nonetheless hit the spot, sending 2 sated dudes on their way home. What happened to the 3rd fella? He blundered in on his good friend's date of course.
Not that it was with that intent that I made my approach, but that was the way I would call it when both only Carol and Dom were in the flesh.
Blissful in each other's company. How not to hate?
Mitigated by my long attained understanding of respective failings of each and every member in our loosely knitted family of friends, I recovered from my amicably short tirade of preferred vulgarities just before I broke the social threshold for acceptable swearing.
As usual, I found out that excluding Dom, the rest whom all seemed adamant at attending the Career fair just the night before, had all answered to greater callings, say sleep for starters.
Leaving me stranded in this quaint three way conversation which I felt I wasn't invited to. I did, for my defense, tried to bail out of my imposition on them but was cordially stayed by their combined entreatment.
Ah, fuck it. I was nuisance once, how hard is it for me to be a nuisance again?
So with the freeing certainty that I couldn't get out of it without being outrightly rude, I simply decided that I might as well make the best of it.
Time to look for another job.
Our odd trio circled the Career fair a couple of times, stopping only when the human congestion crawled to a standstill or turned on itself. We religiously collected assorted pamphlets of various faculties whenever the names of the institutions or the courses they offered piqued our interest, and feeling me with rancor to say, whenever we become waylaid by some over zealous booth attendants hellbent on adding their burdensome load to our pile.
Having more info than we could possibly digest, we stowed away the stack of varied-colored pamphlets and went on a detour for some discounted shopping next door which turns out to be just cursory glances and occasional fiddles but nothing more.
Dinner was the next order of the evening which was concluded after some milling around of the Raffles City Shopping Centre basement. But not before the usual trading of anecdotes, witty observations about all things under the sun and bringing each other up on the latest cause for resentment at one's work.
A candid moment caught on camera.
Fuel for my tummy!
With an hour or two to waste before the two lovebirds make off for their movie plans later that evening, we settled in at J-Co for some serious looking through of the day's bounty at the Career fair and discussions regarding the furtherance of our academic accomplishments.
Where's the J? He's posing for you and making a face in the picture. Go figure.
You might have guessed it but might not believe it. All that serious intentions packed into the donut session turned out to be just another continuation of the dinner conversation.
It's saving grace was that we did after all took the dull stack out for a look or two and perhaps throw in a few minutes of relevant discussion. But that was far as that went before the conversation once again resumed its lighthearted bearing towards the inane.
Look at their seriousness! Its so thick, you can run headlong into it and hurt your head!
With a smile on my face and 9 on the watch's, I took leave of their company and call it a day.
Incidentally, I bought this!
FUNKED IT ALL UP ON 7:23:00 PM